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Weekly-ish stories for humans seeking depth and meaning.

I'm Janelle Hardy and at some point you signed up for this 3-4x/month newsletter on memoir-writing, somatic (body) healing and stories. If you'd like to unsubscribe, just click the unsubscribe link at the bottom.

"Mom, your texts are cold."

Uh oh.

I am not a texty person!

Texting and asynchronous communication stress me out. Waiting for a response. Sometimes all day. A back and forth that would verbally be complete in 20 seconds can stretch out over hours, in drips and drabs.

I know some people love the anticipation, the lingering, that bubble with the three dots appearing and disappearing, then the next line of communication.

Me? I hate it. It feels stressful, sometimes annoying, especially when I don't have a solid, established relationship with the person.

And, I've had not-great experiences with overshares via e-mail/text.

So I've always tried to keep texting limited to logistics. My app use is similarly minimal except when it's useful and necessary (like WhatsApp groups I want to be part of to stay in connection with a group I'm part of).

But I also don't want my darling daughter (and everyone else) to experience my communications as cold, blunt, stressful, because that's never my intention.

And, I've been going on dates, and this texty kind of communication in dating apps is the first step to anything else. I'm discovering that it's a delicate part of the process! 😬

So I asked my daughter to tell me about my texts and texting culture.

"If you use periods it comes across as cold."

"Exclamation points keeps things airy and friendly!!"

"Using lots of exclamation points takes away the potential for misunderstanding."

She thinks "it's probably because of the rise anxiety in gen Z," the predominance of communication via text, and the lack of context and tone in visual communication.

I think she's right. And, it's pretty normal for communication cultures, styles and language usage to change. Periods used to be neutral and '!!' used to be overly and intensely excited. Not anymore in a text convo.

I googled to see what else has been written about this dynamic. Sure enough, plenty.

So I'm committed to learning a new texting style 🤷🏻.

I'm viewing it as a new language within a language.

And when I think of it that way, I remember that I loved the immersive experience of being an exchange student in Japan and Russia, bending my mind and tongue learning new languages and cultures. So here I go...

You probably won't see tons more exclamation marks here!!

And you probably won't see too many dropped periods either

Because newsletters aren't quite the same casual, live vibe as a text screen.

But if we've got a texting relationship, watch me go with '!!!' and 😊😭🙄, filling in those tonal gaps and trying to keep things friendly instead of 'cold.' 😅

In the meantime, something big is headed your way in just a few weeks! Keep your eye on my Instagram stories for details!

I am actually so excited about what I'm creating for you!!!! Swooning with excitement in fact!!

Hint: It includes 20+ amazing people, it's freeeeee and you can get on the registration waitlist here.

xoxo,

Janelle